It has been a while since my last article on this particular blog. And I do feel that I have hurt the reader's feelings by not keeping them up to date. So here is a list of the top ten facts I have given you over the past few months.
1. Elephants suck
2. They think we suck too
3. Indian elephants are too afraid to attack.
4. African elephants can and will control human thoughts.
5. It is unclear when they will attack because they can't swim.
6. African elephants live in Africa, mostly.
7. Once they get to America, the destruction will be inevitable.
8. The Great Depression was cause directly and indirectly by Elephants.
9. My sources are not backed by anything but gut feeling.
10. "Operation Dumbo Drop" was derived from a story told through the ages. A prophecy of giant mammals from the sky, that would come down from the heavens, and leave tusk induced carnage wherever they land.
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